Activity

I am shifting everything in my life. I desire to clear out all the old patterns gone stale. In order to create space for the fresh, new life I long for, I need to remove anything that stands in my way of that. Mainly this is my own resistance. Depression hurts, but it is comfortable. I suppose it can fuel my creative expression, as so very many brilliant artists were, or are, known to be moody and even angry. I take my sadness and rage to the piano. I want to relocate to a place I choose and love, and I want to become the person I envision myself to be. When I read the list of characteristics of this person, I see that I already have many of the traits I seek. It’s only the outward manifestation of this that is lacking. Inside me I am one kind of person, but the life I currently lead feels so out of place, as though I wear shoes of the wrong size. Now it is time for me to record my music to get it out there. Taking that step, which is something I can do myself, may be a way for me to open up channels of energy and increase the flow. I may be shy, reclusive, sullen, even angry, and I know none of these feelings is wrong. As I open to the expanse of the sky, how clearly I see that I’m simply bursting with creativity…that has nowhere to go. It turns inwards and becomes rage and heartbreak.